Hero of the Week Award: April 26, Joe Bell and Faces for Change

Hero of the Week

This week Joe Bell began a remarkable journey with a tragic origin. Joe Bell of La Grande, OR started a two-year, 5,000 mile walk across the United States in memory of his son, Jadin.

Jadin died February 3 from complications suffered after a suicide attempt. He was only 15. Openly gay in a conservative eastern Oregon town, he was bullied mercilessly and finally gave up. The Faces for Change foundation was established in his memory; its mission is to put an end to bullying.

Joe, who has two artificial knees, will speak at schools and local organizations along his walk, spreading the anti-bullying message. What a remarkable memorial to his son.  Joe shows the strength, power, and influence of LGBT allies!

Honorable mention this week goes to Teamsters Local 25 in Boston. When the ever-infamous denizens of Westboro Baptist Church threatened to picket the funeral of Krystle Campbell, a victim of the Boston Marathon bombing, the union organized a human wall. Over 1,000 members and supporters lined the streets, providing support for the family and blocking any possible view of the planned picket. Westboro gave up and opted not to demonstrate after all, a rare and welcome occurrence.

Bigot of the Week Award: April 19, Linda Harvey and Mission America

Bigot of the Week

Regular readers of SJFA will be familiar with Linda Harvey, founder and spokeshater for the odious Mission:America. Harvey has had dishonorable mention before; thanks to my friend Jennifer Carey for highlighting her actions this week that promote her to full-fledge BWA winner.

As LGBT students and their allies around the country prepare for the annual Day of Silence, Harvey is leading her usual parade of lies and bigotry. Arguing that her KKKristian message that keeping LGBT kids safe in schools “encourages sympathy for homosexuality, which is wrong,” our Linda is as charm-free as ever.

Those of us who truly have a Christian worldview, we do not accept the terms, definitions and claims of the advocates of homosexuality, like the claim that standing up against homosexuality and calling it a sin is hateful and is similar to bully. No, it’s not.

Yes, it is.

Bullying and violence against LGBT Americans are still enormous problems; suicides and suicide attempts by LGBT teens are still being reported in horrific numbers. This is true because people like Linda Harvey think that their narrow, hateful “values” are more important that the lives and happiness of millions of people who simply want to be allowed to live freely as themselves.

GLSEN has created a strong video that debunks Harvey’s most recent spewing of bile. Please join in support of today’s Day of Silence and stand against this ongoing attack from people who hide behind flawed religious arguments to destroy lives.

Hero of the Week Award: April 5, Amy Pascal of Sony Pictures

Hero of the Week

This week is is a real pleasure to celebrate an entertainment executive who really understands the power of her industry to influence society — for better or for worse.

Amy Pascal is the co-chair of Sony Pictures and the chair of its Columbia TriStar division. She has been recognized as one of the most important women in entertainment by the Hollywood Reporter and one of the 100 most powerful women in the world by Forbes. She recently spoke at the L.A. Gay and Lesbian Center’s Gala and took her industry to task for the way it treats the LGBT community.

Brokeback Mountain, Milk, Boys Don’t Cry, Philadelphia, The Hours, Gods and Monsters, The Talented Mr. Ripley, A Single Man, My Own Private Idaho, Cloud Atlas – in all these movies, the main character is murdered or martyred or commits suicide or just dies unhappily. And there are far more pernicious and dangerous images that confront gay kids and their parents: the lesbian murderer, the psychotic transvestite, the queen who is humiliated and sometimes tossed off a ship or a ledge.

Pascal takes that analysis one important step further and asks two important questions. First, what is the impact of these messages?

The most benign stereotypes would have a gay kid believe that they will end up being the asexual, witty best friend of the pretty girl, or a drag queen, or a swishy hairdresser. The list goes on… Not every gay character needs to be defined by his or her sexuality. Can’t being gay be one stitch in the fabric of someone’s life? Can’t we depict men and women who just so happen to be gay – perhaps a lawyer or soldier or business executive or scientist or engineer?

More importantly, she issues a challenge to her peers.

We need to create an atmosphere that encourages people to speak up, so we get this right. How about next time, when any of us are reading a script and it says words like fag, or faggot – homo – dyke – take a pencil and just cross it out. Just don’t do it.

How perfectly put. Like it or not, movies, television, webcasts, video games, and the whole of pop culture have a significant influence on our lives and can help shape attitudes. We need more people like Amy Pascal to insist that this power be used for good.

Paul Ryan’s Not-So-Charitable Activity

Well, something in this kitchen is dirty…

It’s not unusual for politicians at every level of government to look for opportunities to show off their good works. They’ll pose with underprivileged kids, pound in a few nails for Habitat for Humanity, speak at a charitable conference, all sorts of things. Some of the resulting photos and news stories show real commitment to social change, some are casual photo ops. Rarely, however, are such things as contrived and ill-conceived as Paul Ryan’s recent moment of let’s pretend.

Last Saturday, the VP hopeful was campaigning in Youngstown, Ohio. One of his stops was at a soup kitchen, where he rolled up his sleeves and pitched in. Sounds great, right? The problem is, the meals had been served, the clients were gone, and the dishes were clean and put away. Ryan bullied his way into the kitchen by pressuring a volunteer and had his picture taken [wait for it] washing a clean pan. Apparently there were no charities in Youngstown that actually needed hope at that moment. Besides, it’s so much nicer dealing with volunteers in a clean kitchen than actually handling food near the >gasp< poor!

Sadly, Ryan’s “out damned spot” moment takes an even darker turn. The Mahoning County St. Vincent De Paul Society that Ryan visited was not contacted by the Romney campaign ahead of the Saturday morning visit. Brian Antag, president of the Society, was aghast and alarmed because his organization prohibits participation in political events.

We’re a faith-based organization; we are apolitical because the majority of our funding is from private donations. It’s strictly in our bylaws not to do it. They showed up there and they did not have permission. [...] I can’t afford to lose funding from these private individuals. For us to even appear like we’re backing somebody, it’s suicide.

Yes, you read that correctly. Paul Ryan bullied a volunteer to enter a facility without permission to wash a clean dish for a handy campaign photo. While doing so, he caused the facility to violate its bylaws and potentially put its funding at risk. Way to care for the needy, Rep. Ryan. It’s not as though we need more evidence of the callous disregard the Romney/Ryan ticket has for anyone outside their lily-white Randian pillars of “justice.” Sadly, the proof just keeps coming, and let’s face it, Romney/Ryan is a dirt that just won’t wash clean!

Pushing Back Against Bullying

Let’s put a stop to bullying

As the nation gradually heads back to school, it’s important to remember that the problem of bullying is still a major issue for many students. Last year saw an unprecedented number of kids commit suicide because they were bullied due to their real or perceived sexual orientation. Given the endorsement of anti-gay discrimination that came from the Boy Scouts, more bullies may feel empowered to act out their aggressions. Studies show that LGBT teens are still more harassed and depressed than their straight peers and violence against the LGBT community is up overall.

Fortunately, many are raising their voices against this tide, pushing for schools and communities to shut down bullying of any kind once and for all. In the past year or so, a number of voices have been raised against bullying: the It Gets Better project, a wonderful comic book called The Power Within, and families of victims have all made a difference. Two other wonderful efforts deserve our attention.

My friend and colleague Alison drew my attention to an important new film, Teach Your Children Well. Directed by Gary Takesian and narrated by Lily Tomlin, this documentary short consists of many important facts and interviews that demonstrate the ongoing problem of bullying.

The film’s primary goal is to bring homophobia and its harmful repercussions to light, and to hopefully effect a change in society’s consciousness such that the bullying and violence against our LGBT young people is greatly reduced – and ultimately eliminated. It is our intention that the message of this film expands beyond theaters and film festivals, reaching into the areas where these aggressive behaviors take place: our schools, homes and neighborhoods.

Regular TSM reader and commenter Daphiny drew my attention to this wonderful story. Kevin Curwick, a Minnesota teen, has responded to the problem of cyberbullying by creating a special Twitter account. @OsseoNiceThings celebrates accomplishments and positive qualities of Curwick’s classmates. Using social media to emphasize the good and drown out the negative has caught on, with many students around the nation creating similar accounts as Kevin’s story spreads.

These are important steps. We must all continue to shine a harsh light on the realities of bullying and not allow schools to fall back on  the “kids being kids” excuse. Until our communities are safe for all, they are safe for none.

Hate Groups Trying to Play Victim Card: Hypocrisy Much?

What, me hate?

First allow me to say how saddened I was to learn that a security guard was injured at the Family Research Council (FRC).  I, for one, am not a proponent of violence, regardless of the fact that FRC and the ironically named National Organization for Marriage (NOM) — along with their sponsored elected officials — are pushing violence as part of their “Christian” agenda.

There is a very good and very real reason why the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) has acknowledged FRC and NOM as hate groups.  Now closet case Tony Perkins and our ball of crazy Maggie (I can’t stop thinking about gay sex) Gallagher are trying to play the victim card. They say the “hate group” label caused the shooting. Good ol’ Maggie is even helping another hate group, LivePrayer, mount a $100 million lawsuit against the SPLC.

Let us have a bit of a history lesson before we proceed.  The FRC is rooted in White Supremacy and has ties to the KKK — big shock there.  Both NOM and the FRC have decades of blood on their hands for pushing their homophobic hate. Violence against the LGBT community has gone up by 13%, as have gay teen suicides.  Where is the apology from the FRC and NOM?  Let us also be reminded of the extraordinary misogyny of these hate groups.  James Dobson, the founder of the FRC (secret lover of Tony Perkins) was quoted as saying: “The biggest Holocaust in world history came out of the Supreme Court with the Roe v. Wade decision.”

What’s sad is that many in the media are buying Perkins’ poor li’l me sob story. The same twisted rationale that has him appear on news programs to provide a “balanced view” has them saying  the “hate group” label is too harsh for a “policy organization.” If any of those so-called journalists had done a bit of research, they would know that the SPLC addressed that issue, highlighting the aggressively hostile language that Perkins and the FRC use about the LGBT community. (GLAAD has a good overview as part of their commentator accountability project. Maggie is on the list there as well.) The crowning irony is that Perkins has repeatedly accused the LGBT community of exploiting bullied gay teens (many of whom committed suicide) to gain sympathy; now he’s hiding behind his employee and “friend.” How christian…

P.S. FRC hosts a big conference each September, the horrifically titled Values Voters Summit. They just confirmed a new speaker for this year’s event…Rep. Paul Ryan. That should be all anyone really needs to know about Romney/Ryan 2012.  Yes, Paul Ryan represents the values or the lack of values of registered Hate Groups!

A Bigot Broken: Andrew Shirvell’s Just Desserts

Big Ole Closet Queen

Disgraced former Michigan assistant Attorney General Andrew Shirvell had his day in court at last…and really wishes he hadn’t. Long-time TSM readers may remember this odious little man. He received one of our earliest Bigot of the Week Awards for his behavior in the fall of 2010. When Chris Armstrong became the first openly gay student body president at the University of Michigan, Shirvell’s bigot alarm started a-ringin’. He mounted a one-man campaign of abuse, posting dozens of obscenity-laden attacks on Armstrong. Shirvell maintained that Armstrong’s election was the result of the “cult of homosexuality” and accused the student of “nazi-like” behavior. (Ironically, the creepy attorney created a whole blog devoted to Armstrong…)

To Armstrong’s credit, he simply stood his ground and continued his studies and leadership. The outcry resulted in Shirvell’s suspension and eventual firing. When the behavior continued, Armstrong filed a harassment lawsuit. He sued for a reasonable $25,000 and offered to withdraw the suit in exchange for a public apology. Shirvell refused.

In the intervening months, Armstrong and his family created a scholarship fund for students who have been victimized by bullying. Shirvell continued to rant about the homosexual agenda, published more lies about Armstrong, and attempted a failed countersuit. This week it all came to a close when a jury awarded Armstrong an impressive $4.5 Million. One has to wonder what kind of obsession or guilt got Shirvell’s crazy train started. Once it was rolling, however, it just kept speeding down the tracks. Now it’s plunged off a cliff and Shirvell is the victim of a catastrophe entirely of his own making. It seems to me that it is painfully obvious that Shirvell is gay and is obsessed with Armstrong. Who knows how much longer that closet will be able to contain Shirvell.  Regardless of whether or not he busts out of the closet, his pathology makes him pathetic.

How Wrong Can the Right Be?

Minister of Hate

This will sadly be James Queale’s last contribution to TSM, as he is starting his own blog.  Jamie thank you for your contribution to TSM. We all look forward to reading your new blog.

After the fire storm over Bryan Fischer’s advocating for kidnapping children from gay parents, I would like to fully examine how the extreme right-wing affects the LGBT community and allies. In doing this, I want to show that claims against the LGBT community are false.

Extreme Right-Wing:

Bullying – They advocate that schools allow people of faith to discriminate against LGBT students if their religious text or beliefs “justify” the persecution. This causes various students to feel unsafe and unwanted causing lapses in attendance and increasing gay teen suicide.

Adoption – They advocate that children should not be allowed to be adopted by same-sex couples. Many claim that gay men are automatically pedophiles and children should not be allowed around them, even though statistics show that pedophiles are predominately heterosexual. Also, same-sex couples go through the very same screening that opposite sex couples go through when adopting.

Marriage – They advocate against allowing same-sex couples marrying, causing numerous couples to not have the same spousal benefits that straight married couples have. Same-sex couples in a bi-national relationship may be separated and left to find other options to be together because of the Defense of Marriage Act.

Employment – They advocate not allowing the government to ban businesses from firing or not hiring someone because they are from the LGBT community. This causes many to not find jobs which increases unemployment.

LGBT Advocates:

Bullying – We advocate that schools have protections for students regardless of religion, race, gender, or sexual orientation. This builds a productive environment and allows students to learn tolerance and diversity.

Adoption – We advocate that loving same-sex couples be allowed to adopt children, which gives children a home and a sense of belonging. This limits the number of children that are bounced around the system and helps build stronger communities.

Marriage – We advocate that marriage is a right and that everyone of any sexuality should be able to enjoy it. This allows same-sex couples to have full spousal benefits, which removes a significant financial burden. This also allows bi-national couples to sponsor their foreign born partners instead of being separated. This has no affect on “traditional” marriage as straight people are not forced to marry someone of the same sex. Even when it comes to religious institutions, exemptions are made so that churches that do not acknowledge same sex couples do not have to marry them.

Employment – We advocate that businesses should not be allowed to fire an employee because of their sexual orientation. Sexuality has no affect on work ability and should not be a factor when hiring or firing. This helps keep unemployment down and helps the workplace be a more productive and diverse environment. New ideas and innovation come from diversity.

As you can see, what the LGBT community advocates and what the extreme right-wing advocates are very different. One community wants to put policies into place that strengthen society and one wants to harm society.

Bigot of the Week Award: July 20, Boy Scouts of America

Bigot of the Week

Thank you to my friend and LGBT ally Jennifer Carey for inspiring me to write this article. This week the Boy Scouts of American burrowed all the way back to the 1950s to embrace a false America and ignore the rights of an entire segment of the U.S. population. The organization, aptly founded in the waning of the Victorian Era, opted to maintain their restriction against LGBT Scouts and Scout leaders. The Scouts’ national spokesman, Deron (I’m afraid of the gays) Smith, told The Associated Press that an 11-member special committee, formed discreetly by top Scout leaders in 2010, came to the conclusion that the exclusion policy “is absolutely the best policy.” REALLY? Best for whom?

The decision was unanimous and was announced by the group’s media wing. It cited parent concerns and tradition as key factors in upholding bias.

The committee included a diversity of perspectives and opinions. The review included forthright and candid conversation and extensive research and evaluations – both from within Scouting and from outside the organization. The committee’s work and conclusion is that this policy reflects the beliefs and perspectives of the BSA’s members, thereby allowing Scouting to remain focused on its mission and the work it is doing to serve more youth.

I don’t think the Scouts know what most of those words mean. Diversity? Candid? Research? Service? If having a hate-the-gays tea with Tony Perkins and Maggie Gallagher fits those words, maybe. How else could they have come to such an odious conclusion a decade into the 21st Century? The review was shrouded in secrecy. None of the panelists were named publicly, the meetings were secret, and the process was never disclosed. The lack of transparency reinforces the image of a secretive group uninterested in the nation which it hypothetically serves. For a group that purports to create tomorrow’s leaders, hiding behind “beliefs and perspectives of … members” is cowardly at best. Exactly what type of leaders are they hoping to foster?

Some adult Scouts had put pressure on leadership. Eagle Scout and journalist Naka Nathaniel renounced his rank in a public statement last month. Eagle Scout Zach Wahls, the Iowa college student with two lesbian mothers who famously testified for marriage equality, collected tens of thousands of signatures in support of a policy change. He delivered them to the Scouts’ annual meeting to no avail.

Given the improvements for LGBT rights in the past decade, many were hopeful that the Scouts would recognize their error. Protections against sexual orientation discrimination have increased significantly. Marriage equality exists in six states and the District of Columbia; many more have civil union laws. President Obama’s recent support of marriage equality has helped shift the national conversation, and recent polls show all-time high support for gay rights across the country. While the Scouts re-endorsed discrimination, the Episcopal Church adopted a liturgy for same-sex unions and approved ordination of transgender priests. Overall support for transgender rights has increased, and the fully inclusive Girl Scouts accept lesbian and transgender members and leaders.  Even the founding branch of the Boy Scouts, Britain’s Scout Association, refuses to discriminate on sexual orientation. The Scouts have turned a deaf ear and a bigoted blind eye to the conversation.

More importantly, the Boy Scouts have sent a dangerous message to America’s youth. By maintaining the ban they reinforce two horrific stereotypes: that gay kids are somehow of lesser value and that LGBT adults are somehow worse stewards of youth. Study upon study shows that the sexual orientation of an adult is not a factor in abuse of children — just ask Penn State or the Catholic Church. More significantly, in the wake of the worst year for LGBT-based bullying (and consequent suicides) on record, the Scouts have told bullies that they are justified and kids who differ from “acceptable” norms that they deserve what they get. The Scouting oath includes

To help other people at all times

It’s a shame the Boy Scouts of America have chosen to return to their Victorian roots rather than live up to their principles. Is there a merit badge for hypocrisy?

Celebrating LGBTQ History on Fathers’ Day: LGBT Parents

When I was growing up in the 70s the gay rights movement was just beginning. While it would occasionally surge onto the news, it was in many ways treated as secondary to other movements like the anti-war protests and Second Wave Feminism. Those early days truly changed the landscape, however, and set the stage for the broader progress we see today. Things really moved backwards in the 80s and 90s, when you consider how easily gay and lesbian references cropped up on 70s TV like Sonny and Cher and the Mary Tyler Moore Show.

One thing that would never get into the press or the programs was the idea of gay parents. Even as laws punishing gay sex slowly were repealed or went unenforced in many places, homosexuality was still used as a legal barrier to adoption or to custody. (Interesting how that shows how obsessed our opponents are with the sexual side of things…) While the legal landscape still has a way to go, LGBT parents are far more visible and that’s a very good thing. It’s hard to fear what you understand, and it’s easy to understand your neighbors.

Starting with famous books like Heather Has Two Mommies, the narrative of gay parents as part of the American fabric has slowly become clearer and clearer. Celebrity parents like Melissa Etheridge and Neil Patrick Harris opening their homes show loving, supportive families that look familiar to most people. Many more movies and TV show LGBT parents and adoptions just as a matter of course. Modern Family does a phenomenal job of normalizing same-sex parenting, and is far more about parenting than making a big deal that the parents just happen to be two dads.  The Kids Are All Right shows that LGBT families are just as normal (and messed up) as any other families – the fact that there are two moms is the least of their issues. JC Penney’s bold new brand is aggressively acknowledging that families come in all flavors with inclusive advertising images (much to the ire of One Million Moms). Even comic books get into the game, with DC’s Apollo and Midnighter adopting Jenny Quantum after their marriage.

Being a parent is hard and being a good parent in a complex world is even harder. We need kids to have strong families and good support; the orientations of the parents are irrelevant. No matter what Mark Regnerus and his funders would have you believe, LGBT folk make great parents, and all the good research supports that wholeheartedly. In fact, same-sex households can turn out kids as wonderful as Zach Wahls. So let’s take time this Fathers’ Day to celebrate the families that often require more intent and face challenges from the narrow-minded no matter how well they work.

P.S. – Let’s also celebrate the straight parents who love and accept their LGBT children unconditionally. Since bullying and abuse of these kids is still a significant problem, a loving home is often the saving grace. Three cheers to the Judy Shepards, Daphne’s Moms, and PFLAG moms and dads all over America.