Tag Archives: candidates

Wednesday Word of the Week, May 18

18 May

The More You Look, The Less You Like.

This week’s word is: CANDIDATE

one of the people competing in an election

Despite the Presidential Primary season being months away, many Republican hopefuls have declared their candidacy, officially and not so much so. Who are these people, anyway?

Herman CAIN

Cain and Abel were the first children of Adam and Eve born after the Fall of Man; Cain killed Abel out of jealousy and was exiled by God

Oops. Not too auspicious there, Herman. Given his low profile, exile seems pretty likely after a primary or two.

NEWT Gingrich

a small animal similar to a lizard that mostly lives in water

At the risk of offending the lizards, small and slimy seems like a good description. He’s also wriggly, given how many times he’s decided not to decide about running.

Mike Huckabee, whose affable demeanor hides the heart of a HUCKSTER

someone who sells things dishonestly or illegally

Ron Paul, whose election would cast a PALL

a sudden numbing dread

on the whole country.

Tim Pawlenty may not be well-know by most Americans, but there are PLENTY

a large amount of something, or a large number of things

of reasons to dislike him.

Mitt ROMNEY

one of an English breed of hardy sheep, having coarse, long wool

He’s certainly hardy, as his constantly resurging candidacy attests; his demeanor is slickly robotic, but his methods are coarse and woolly.

Rick Santorum, a man whose views are so loathsome that his last name was rather vulgarly redefined in a contest.

Donald TRUMP

the suit that players decide will be worth the most in a card game

Heavy on the suit, light on the “worth the most” especially now that it looks like he’s out of the running again. We’ll see what he decides next week…

We also have a quartet of nearly complete unknowns, the DARK HORSE

a political candidate who is not well known but could win unexpectedly

Republicans, with an emphasis on “unexpectedly” for Fred Karger, Gary Johnson, Tom Miller, and Vern Wuensche. Their best chances of winning rest on the fact that their competition is so well known for their odiousness. If they are anything like the rest of the pack, consider them to be the four darkhorsemen of the Apocalypse.

Last but not least, a pair of undecideds, Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann, whose candidacies would lend a certain festival air to the election but in the end an utterly maddening one. Perhaps they will run together so we can go into Bachmann Palin Overdrive…

Looking at this probable competition, it is easy to see why President Obama’s favorables are rising. We must be vigilant, however, as the last election demonstrated just how absurd and unpredictable the actions of the electorate can be.

All of this week’s definitions courtesy of Macmillan Dictionary Online.

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