Tag Archives: texting

Wednesday Word of the Week, October 26: Epistle

26 Oct

Where is the SEND button?

This week’s word is EPISTLE

a piece of writing in the form of a letter

Over the past week, I have had two separate experiences which have caused me to ponder the value and relevance of written communication in the modern age. Both of these events are related to my work as a tutor for college students in the Boston area.

Although, at 29, I am barely a half-generation (at most) removed from most of the students with whom I work, the gap in communication strategies is wide. I willingly own a piece of this given my willful resistance to most social media, but as someone who participates in this online community and keeps in touch with many friends by email, I was surprised by how starkly the moments struck me.

The first event involved a conversation with a student about the novel Dracula. It was her first experience with an epistolary novel and she found the experience jarring. She understood the principle of writing letters and obviously knew that the Victorians had no email, but the art and value of letters as communication and persuasion was lost on her. Her entire context for communication was texting and occasionally exchanging emails. The results were immediate and the need for lengthy description and explanation was utterly absent.

Surely, she opined, the author was taking liberties with the form and no-one would ever have written letters like this in real life. This led to a fascinating discussion (and a good thesis for her paper, fortunately) about the very different requirements for communication in a pre-electronic age. Not only could weeks or even months pass between messages, but one party to the communication might well be in a place that the other would never see at all. This required a sense of description and a sensitivity to the information conveyed. It also meant that the writer of a letter had to reflect on his or her content in a way not required by modern communication tools. The result of the communication was INTIMACY

a close personal relationship; something personal or private that you say or do

not immediacy. Such reflection certainly prevented many of the consequences of thoughtless typing that we’ve seen in recent months.

The second event was a conversation with a student regarding his settling into life on campus. I asked, perhaps naively, how the transition from old friends and family to new acquaintances was going. He indicated that he hadn’t met many people outside of his roommate and casual classroom acquaintances because he was still so well connected with his friends from high school. This ought not to have shocked me, but it did. The prevalence of electronic communication (through a device always on one’s person) has evaporated the sense of DISTANCE

the fact or feeling that two people or things are far apart from each other

This student was accustomed to communicating frequently and consistently with friends by text and tweet. The physical distance matters to some extent, but the nature of the communication is not particularly jarring. Looking again at my own experience, things were quite different. I was certainly able to communicate with people via email, faster than the postal service and cheaper than the phone, but I had to be at a computer and had no expectation of an immediate response. That made electronic communication a poor second choice. As a result, I had to turn to the people around me for ENGAGEMENT

the feeling of being involved in a particular activity or group

I had left one home and was building an new community. That experience helped me mature as a person and develop new ways of thinking. The friends who remained from my life before college did so in new ways, reflecting their maturation and growth as well. Based on the conversation with the one student, I later discussed this with others whom I tutor. A significant percentage (not quite a majority) are at least as engaged with their pre-college friends as with any aspects of their new communities. This certainly provides a level of comfort and security, but it also stifles the valuable need to make the most of a new experience. One value of a college education is the development of coping and growth skills. How will people who have never truly needed to fully engage with a new environment succeed when thrust into a work situation that demands participation with new people? It will be interesting to see what employers are saying about this trend in three to five years.

Please do not misunderstand me. I believe that most modern advancement is a good thing. The abilities to maintain connections and receive rapid feedback can be worthwhile. I fear, however, that we are losing our sense of the art of communication. If all one’s friends are old friends and every message is a fixed length, where do we have room to grow as humans?

All definitions courtesy of Macmillan Dictionary Online.

Creating a Contagion of Community

6 Mar

What must it be like to live in Clatterford? For those not in the know, this fictional British town is the setting of Jam and Jerusalem, a sitcom written by Jennifer Saunders (of Absolutely Fabulous fame). Aired as Clatterford in the U.S., the show is a touching look at life in a small village, mostly through the eyes of the members of the local women’s guild. The remarkable thing about Clatterford (other than the expected Britcom eccentricity) is the true sense of community. Even if they get on one another’s nerves, the citizens of Clatterford care for one another for no other reason than their shared community. They are neighbors, and neighbors care for one another. (In fact, the weakest relationships in the stories are those of family.)

I know that life in Clatterford is idealized, but watching it always makes me think about how fractured our modern sense of community has become. Michael and I are very lucky to have wonderful, supportive, caring neighbors. This has not been the case in every place that we have lived. Most of the people I know have at best a passing acquaintance with their nearest neighbors and no sense of a larger neighborhood or community. Many who do engage, do so as part of a fractious neighborhood association that obliterates any sense of true community.

Modern American life places a low value on work / life balance. For those who try to find a good middle ground, the life part often gets subsumed by rushing from obligation to obligation, not taking the time to get to know the people one interacts with as anything other than another Board member or soccer mom.

“Reality” television sets bizarre expectations for what it means to be a normal person. Communities are painted as hostile and competitive. People don’t matter unless they’re winning something and defeating someone else. Participation is reduced to an Oprah-esque purging, with each person waiting for their turn to mist up in the guest chair.

Online “communities” also contribute to this artificiality. FaceBook is a fine place to share passing comments with casual acquaintances or to post a joke or opinion. Among the farm animals, pointless dining updates, and inappropriate airing of grievances, however, there is very little real community. Internet communities are fine for what they are, and often let geographically disparate people share interests, but they are not a substitute for real human interaction.

In the places we can interact with real humans, half the people around us are texting, tweeting, and shouting into their gadgets. Caught up in a false sense of urgency, one can mistake the ability to be connected with the need to be, ironically failing to engage with the broader world one is actually in.

There are, of course, wonderful exceptions. It is heartening to see people like Zach Wahls take the time to engage with their communities and use voices for good. I am fortunate enough to work in a field that has community at its very heart. (In fact, the theme of this year’s Oregon Library Association conference is “Libraries build Communities build Libraries.”) Michael and I have been lucky enough to live in two supportive, engaging communities. It just feels like this is the exception rather than the rule right now.

It takes energy to be part of a community, but it is energy that is returned multifold. As winter wanes, let’s all use the new spring as an opportunity to get out into the world.

  • Turn off your television.
  • Walk away from your computer (For the record, I fully acknowledge the irony of posting this instruction on a blog.)
  • Leave your phone at home.
  • Find a place to gather with people and make the effort to actually talk to them.
  • Mix community and good works – volunteer!

Community is contagious. Let’s all try to be carriers.

P.S. – As an added bonus, Jam and Jerusalem has one of the most perfect theme songs in television. Ray Davies (of the Kinks) brilliant paean to community, The Village Green Preservation Society, is lovingly and gently adapted by Kate Rusby.

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