Tag Archives: misogyny

45 Fatigue: The Struggle Is Real

30 Jul

Somehow I thought for sure this alone would have prevented 45 from moving forward, that his mocking a person with a disability would have been enough. Then I thought his bragging about “grabbing a woman by the pussy” would have been enough to stop him. Sadly, this is who we are stuck with currently and who is destroying Democracy on a daily basis. I do wonder how on earth are people able to live with themselves for voting for such a monster.

As I mentioned in my last article, I believe most of the nation is currently experiencing some serious 45 Fatigue — most of us in the nation are currently on edge, pugnacious, unsettled, anxious, depressed, angry, or any combination of the above. And it is not just those of us who identify as progressives who are feeling the pain. I am experiencing people all over the political spectrum who are struggling — as Ru Paul’s Kennedy Davenport said: “The struggle is real.”

I have some friends/family in Georgia who have been lifelong Republicans who are feeling the pain and disappointment. I suspect many Republicans are in mourning, for they are now realizing the party they believed in has been obliterated by 45, Paul Ryan, and Mitch McConnell.

One can’t even keep up with the daily barrage of bizarre goings on and the continued human rights violations that we are kept abreast of via Twitter, because that is now the way the President of the United States communicates with us. First, 45 and his administration came for our Muslim friends and family, then they came for the Latino community, then 45 came after the journalists, and scientists, then he came after the poor and tried to strip away health care for millions, then he came after all of us in the LGBT community. I hardly know how to cope. What’s more, I have daily reminders that my family members who supported and still support 45 are responsible for this destruction.

Apparently, there is and will always be approximately 25% of the population that will always support 45 regardles. This population is implacable and also sadly misinformed and guided by fear, racism, misogyny, and homophobia.  Sadly, 45 and his followers have only proven they are, in fact, deplorable. Of course, this hurts my heart more than I can express. It hurts my heart that the behavior we witness daily could be acceptable to anyone. 45’s appointment of Scaramucci is nothing less than appalling and only helps to normalize a vulgar society. I’m sure Scaramucci is only too happy to be 45’s work wife, or is he the Mini-Me for 45?

As I said, I can’t even recount all of what has happened in just the past week. Do I start with his inappropriate behavior with his speech to the Boy Scouts, whom he apparently thought were his Trumpenjugend? Do I address the transphobia? Do I focus on his encouraging police to increase brutality? How about bullying his loyal attack dog, Jeff Sessions or firing Reince Priebus? Blindsiding military commanders in hateful tweets that led them to believe we might be headed for war? I am having difficulty coping, as I know the rest of the 75% of the nation is right now. It is clear Scaramucci is an echo chamber for 45 and is helping to normalize vulgarity, as though this were some how Presidential? Yes, national television and radio are broadcasting Scaramucci’s speeches: “What I want to do is fucking kill all of the leakers…I’m not Steve Bannon, I’m not trying to suck my own cock.”  This from the new Director of Communications, sanctioned by 45. Wow! I have no words.

What is helping me endure this nightmare is watching television shows like: The Good Fight, Daytime Divas, Ru Paul’s Dragrace, and Samantha Bee. What are you doing to cope? How can we support each other? How can we be loving of ourselves, and of each other? I am going to work hard to invite joy into my life. I hope all of you find ways of creating and sustaining joy. Peace, Michael.

When Will Integrity Become Fashionable Again?

5 Jun

The GOP On The Wrong Side of History

The past 134 days, 10 hours, and 8 minutes have been far more excruciating than I would have ever thought. 45 has managed to encourage and  celebrate racism, Islamophobia, homophobia, and misogyny in unprecedented ways. We seem to wake up everyday to discover yet another way in which 45 has trashed the Constitution of the United States and found ways to install himself as dictator.  According to NBC News, CBS News, Slate.com, and the Southern Poverty Law Center’s collected data, Hate Crimes have risen exponentially — specifically crimes against the LGBT community, Jews, women, people of color, and Muslims.

Here in Portland, Oregon the White Supremacist group/pro-Trump rally will march on Sunday, in the wake of the murders of Ricky Best and Taliesin Myrddin Namkai-Meche. These murders were committed by White Supremacist, Jeremy Joseph Christian. Sadly, despite the efforts of Mayor Ted Wheeler to ask the group not to march on Sunday, the response was: “if you don’t let us march, we can’t guarantee there won’t be violence.”

Violence seems to be the language of the Republican party today. The GOP encourage it, reward it, and celebrate it. We have no further to look at last week’s debacle with Greg Gianforte. Gianforte was approached by a journalist from the Guardian, Ben Jacobs. After Jacobs asked a question about healthcare, the multi-millionaire Gianforte grabbed Jacobs by the neck with both hands, body slammed him, and threw him to the ground breaking his glasses. Sadly and disgustingly, the GOP rallied around the millionaire and vilified the journalist. It does not take much to connect the dots here.

When the President of the United States vilifies the free press by declaring that “the free press is the enemy of the state,” it is not a surprise that Gianforte and the other GOP bullies feel emboldened to become physically violent. I thought people who are leaders and in positions of power were supposed to model how to be in community and how to use our words. Rather, what is being modeled is physical violence and an inability to be honest and honor the First Amendment. Maybe it is just me, but I don’t believe Gianforte should be allowed to hold public office.  Lest we forget another obnoxious example of Republican violence against the press: New York Republican Michael Grimm. Grimm threatened a reporter and said: “Let me be clear to you. If you ever do that to me again I will throw you off this fucking balcony.”  Sorry, that just does not seem like leadership qualities to me. Fortunately, Grimm is now in prison — not for assault against people in the press, but for the breaking of tax laws. Speaking of which, where are 45’s tax returns? Oh, right. We have not seen them.

The bigger picture for me and what I find most profoundly disturbing, is there does not seem to be one member in the Republican party who has just a shred of integrity or human decency. There is no one willing to come forward and call out bad, illegal, and unethical behavior.  Unlike Watergate, there is no one willing to stand up to 45. Where is our John Dean? 45 continues to lie to the American people and to the press and not one Republican officeholder finds this problematic. The new Trumpcare health plan will deny 23 million people access to health care, including me and my family, and Ayn Rand’s response, oops, I mean Paul Ryan’s response was: (my computer always does auto-correct from Paul Ryan to Ayn Rand) “We are keeping our promise.” It is very difficult not to hear the racism here as, “We promise to undo everything that black man did.”

Sadly, every day just seems to get worse and worse. I wake up each morning waiting  to learn what human rights will this administration violate, what more supports will be put in place that dismantle democracy and firmly establish an authoritarian government. Is there anyone who can put this man and his administration in check? I grow exhausted with the tagline being pushed over at Fox and by 45’s team that he is “working for America.”  What America are y’all talking about? I, too, live in America, as does my husband, my black friends and family members, my queer Muslim family members, my Latino friends and family. 45 is not working to help us!

The one place where 45 told the truth was when he declared “I could stand in the middle of 5th Avenue and shoot somebody and not lose any voters.”  Apparently, that has now turned out to be true. I am more than just a little sad about what this says about our country. Trump is not just shooting somebody, he is hurting over two thirds of the population of the United States, not to mention all of the people on the earth he is harming because of his delusional beliefs around climate change. Where are the GOP voices that will shout out “Enough!”? There must be one of you that has a modicum of integrity.

I can only hope that “Covfefe” means Impeachment.

Dear Catholics…

10 Apr

Dear Catholics, please help me out here. I am truly and desperately trying to understand how those of you who supported Trump did so because of your identity around being Catholic. Sadly, I have family who have used the “we voted for Trump because we are good Catholics” excuse.

Here is some background information. I was talking with a white, heterosexual, cisgender, able bodied, middle class man last week. He was explaining to me that being gay or transgender had nothing to do with gender equity and more importantly that being gay or transgender was WRONG and those people would go to hell. Subsequently, this person explained why he supports Trump: “Because it is God’s will.” Sadly, this white heterosexual man then went into defensive mode by saying: “…by the way some of my friends are gay — they were even at my wedding. While I know they are wrong and will go to Hell, they are friends of mine.” Oy! I wonder if these “gay friends,” assuming they do exist, would consider him a friend?

Here is where I need some help. Please do chime in and illuminate and educate me. Does your God really support a man like Trump — a man who said it is okay to grab a woman buy the genitals? A man who appoints a white supremacist as the attorney general? A man whose behavior has demonstrated nothing but great avarice? A man who publicly mocked a man with disabilities? Is that the God you worship? Who would Jesus hate?

Furthermore, I thought Catholics were against divorce and adultery. How is that you are able to give Trump a dispensation here? Do the rules only apply to those who are poor and cannot afford to buy off a fraud case for $25 million dollars?

Just a quick history lesson here, for those Catholics that are climate change deniers and think science is just a bunch of poo poo, let us remember that in 1633 Galileo was locked up by the Catholic Church for heresy for asserting that the earth was round and revolved around the sun, which countered the wrong geocentric model the church subscribed to at the time. Damn that science! It took over 300 years for the church to acknowledge it was wrong and that Galileo was right. I’m horrifically sad to see that we seem to be repeating history.

Again, I am truly trying to understand how and why Catholics supported and still seem to support Trump and his administration. From my understanding of Catholicism and Christianity, his behavior seems antithetical to the teachings of Christ. I am also exceedingly sad for this man’s children. What if one of them is gay or trans-identified? This man made it clear he feels obligated to judge them and condemn them. Maybe it is just me, but this does not seem like good parenting, nor does it seem very godly. I welcome all voices on this issue to help better educate us all.

The Hypocrisy of Mitch McConnell

6 Apr

I am considering this a public service announcement, courtesy of my husband, Robert. There are clearly a set of rules for Republicans and a wholly different set of rules for the rest of us. These are the people who have created and sustained 45. Gorsuch is a threat to democracy and a threat to all targeted people.

Please contact your senators and let them know it is not acceptable to continue to put racist, homophobic, misogynists into positions of power.

45, Subterfuge, and Russia

24 Mar

Love’s Twisted Secret

Forgive my absence, but I have been experiencing such fatigue from 45 that there are days I can barely hold my head up. We seem to awake to a new disaster from 45 every morning, with his late night or early morning tweets.

Where do we even start to unpack the number of lies perpetrated by 45 and his administration? When do we as a nation say ENOUGH! STOP! Clearly, the morally bankrupt GOP are not going to put 45 in check, as he is implementing the pathetic agenda of the Republican party: stripping people of healthcare, fear mongering, normalizing racism, homophobia, and, misogyny. Sadly, if we impeach 45 we are stuck with people that are just as nefarious and just as sociopathic as he is.

I hear and read about the number of distractions by 45 and have come to my own conclusion that these distractions matter just as much as Trump’s connections to the Russians during his campaign. Sadly, we have at least 25% of the population that can’t be bothered with facts or science. The fact that 45 lied about President Obama wiretapping Trump Tower, the fact that 45 lied about an attack on Sweden, the fact that Kellyanne lied about a fictional Bowling Green massacre and made up a bizarre story that our microwaves are spying on us — none of this seems to be enough for the nation to put these people in check. Where do we go when the leader of the United States outright lies on a daily basis–lies that are so huge that I would think they amount to treason. You know it is bad when even the very conservative Wall Street Journal has had enough of 45 and his lies when they say: “The President clings to his assertion like a drunk to an empty gin bottle,” referring to the complete fiction about being wire tapped.

I also want to come back to this attempt at repealing Obamacare which will strip at least 24 million people of health insurance, including my family. What most thinking people have always known, it has become increasingly clear that the resistance around the Affordable Care Act was rooted in racism–that it was a product of that black president.

On to hypocrisy. The always morally corrupt Mitch McConnell, issued a mandate during President Obama’s tenure that the GOP would block any SCOTUS appointment. Regrettably and most embarrassingly for us as a nation, Merrick Garland was not even allowed a hearing. If we follow the GOP’s logic (wow–talk about oxymoronic) then would it not also stand to reason we should not even bother to entertain allowing the horrifically racist, homophobic, misogynist Neil Gorsuch a hearing while 45 is under investigation by the FBI?

Moving on to the myriad connections to Russian and the tampering of the 2016 election. The number of ties of 45 and his family and administration to Russian is more than just problematic–it calls into question our very democracy. And now sadly, I have to divulge a secret that I hope will finally produce an investigation that will bring down the reprehensible and hypocritical GOP.  Even Vice-President Mike Pence has connections to the Russians–connections that some might find less than savory. Pence has paid for sex with none less than the infamous Katya. Yes, Katya who seemed so innocent on RuPaul’s Drag Race, whom I so wanted to win RuPaul’s All Stars slept with Pence for money. Sorry to have outed this secret of Katya’s.

Oh goodness!  I feel a bit dizzy. The fatigue, anxiety, and fear of the past 60 days of 45 being in office allowed my head to be full of confusing facts. For a minute there, I thought Mike Pence was having sex with Katya. Dear Reader, please practice some serious self-care. We need to stay alert, in solidarity, and we need to find some joy and laughter!

How to Love Radically in the Era of Trump

6 Feb

radical-loveI have been struggling, along with 2/3 of the nation, since November. I have been fearful, hurt, and worried for ALL targeted communities. For those who insultingly made this about “Hillary lost, get over it,” you missed the point, quite sadly. This was about resisting a fascist regime, which we are now under, as evidenced by the over 20 Executive Orders delivered by Trump — as evidenced by the myriad lies spread by Trump and his team (please don’t make up attacks, Kellyanne).  This was about supporting a billionaire bully who makes fun of people with disabilities  and says it is acceptable to grab women by their genitals.

And so I struggle. I struggle with how to be loving to Trump supporters, some of whom are family members — family members who have decidedly voted against me, my family, my friends, and the earth. Yet I must maintain that we have to stay in community; we have to operate from our hearts first; we have to make space for those who are hurting us. I STRUGGLE!

I struggle every day to make this space for people who are deliberately oppressing so many. It is hard to love someone when they are punching you or shooting at you or sustaining systems of oppression. Moreover, I don’t want to become like those who are oppressing us! I think our individual and collective ability to RESIST with every fiber of our being and simultaneously love and make space for Trump supporters is Radical Love. I would love to take credit for this, but at least two of my friends for over 30 years, Jen, and DeShawn helped me here.

I feel obligated to share some survival tips and invite you to share how you are surviving a world gone mad.

  1. Take a break from news and social media.
  2. If you are able to, binge watch some tv that brings you joy. Here, I would strongly recommend the Netflix remake of One Day At A Time. My friend Gita recommended this to me, and Robert and I are loving it! It has a Latina cast and addresses social issues and is FUN! Rita Moreno is in it along with Justina Machado, and I think I am in love with Isabella Gómez. 
  3. With intentionality, seek out friends, family, and family of choice who feed your soul.

Finally, join me in a commitment to Radical Love! I commit to being in and operating from a place of love, while I know there are days I will fail at this. When I fail at this, I will not shame myself. I will continue to work towards building community, solidarity, and find ways to both resist this current fascist regime and love those who are engaged in supporting a world of fear, hate, and oppression. If this sounds or feels contradictory to you, all I can say is: I’m able to hold a lot of tension around being messy — this work we do towards social justice/transformative justice is MESSY! We don’t do this work in isolation and we will not complete it, but we must be engaged!

I invite you to share how you are navigating currently. What is working and what is not working?

Standing in love and solidarity,

Michael

Resist: The Downfall of the United States

20 Jan

resistI know I and millions of Americans are in mourning today. We are in mourning for the contempt, disdain, and utter destruction of Trump and  his racist, homophobic cabinet of multi-millionaires. We are mourning the celebration of sociopathy over compassion and love and the idea of paying it forward. We are mourning the day in history when the world will look back and ask: “why and how did people support Trump?” Today I weep for America.

The old rules of any type of civility are now over and we are now navigating a Trump world of sociopathy. Yes, Trump, Kellyanne Conway, Jeff Sessions, Reince Priebus, Paul Ryan, Mitch McConnell and most of the GOP are now engaged in such mendacity and hypocrisy that the world seems upside down.

How do we resist? We keep vigilant, we continue to protest, we continue to call our members of congress and demand to be heard. I realize this is difficult, given that Paul Ryan seems to have disconnected his phone, as I have been calling his office once every day. We must never normalize this. We must never become people who turn their backs on the poor, the targeted, the registered! We all know that Trump will soon turn Americans against each other and ask that we spy on each other and report people. We know from his behavior that soon news outlets will not be invited to the White House; that he will censure journalists that ask questions; or that he will just stop providing news conferences.

I will challenge myself and all of America to take action! We need to organize, support each other, and change this system. Let us make every effort to mitigate the destruction he has laid out, the shredding of rights he has promised. Stay mobilized and passionate! There are anti-Trump rallies taking place all over the country — people are organizing and taking action. Be part of the movement, the resistance.

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